Monday, October 11, 2010

Why oh why.....

Sometimes i really hate my obsessive personality. I cant do things to a small extent... i take them to the extreme..... its like with smoking, drinking, eating.... god all of it.

Im currently obsessing over my thoughts for Anton... it just doesn't stop, i swim and think of him, i work and think of him and i eat whilst thinking of him..... why cant i just be normal.

Im considering getting facebook back again... maybe temporarily. If it doesn't work out ill delete it again but i feel like i have put myself in a cardboard box and have segregated myself from a lot of the people i value incredibly.... why should i block myself off from some of the amazing people i know because of my angry thoughts and beliefs on facebook. I still dont agree with a lot of things about facebook and it does still anger me... but for the fact that i miss out on information on music i love and big things happening to the people around me makes me feel like im in the stoneage. Am i stupid in having the beliefs that i do about facebook... should i just become like everyone else and conform to it..... yeah i guess i should, sometimes its not bad being a fish maybe ill just swim along for a little while.

I hate the fact that sometimes im like this..... i will ponder for the next couple of days as to whether i facebook it up again...


  1. Hey ash....its a tough descision about weather to get facebook again. I definitely see both sides.

    I deleted my facebook account just over a year ago. There are definitely pros and cons. I really hate facebook and the obsession the ENTIRE world has with it. Everytime I meet someone, or see an old friend they just go "i'll facebook you" and I have to explain that I don't have facebook. Even my parents, my aunt and uncle...everyone I know has it. I personally felt liberated when I deleted mine. I don't feel judged by facebook people know.

    But I know what you mean about cutting yourself off from the world. I don't get invited to things because I'm not on facebook. Its not because my friends don't like me, but its because they forget. Everyone has facebook, so its the easiet way to organise social events, so I miss out on a lot. Also with music and movies and things we are fans of, facebook has a lot of info that we miss out on.

    I see your dilema...but I do think maybe you have a good point. I'm not sure how long you've been without facebook, but maybe you should get it again just to test it out and see how you feel. Is there a chance you could ask Anton to catch up for a drink or something?? My fingers are crossed for you.

  2. My son got angry with Facebook and started to delete everything. Then realized he liked knowing about SOME of his friends and not all. Start up Facebook again and keep the friends you want to stay in touch with and know how they are doing and ignore the others. I removed a bunch of friends from an old job and I doubt they even noticed. I do keep my neices and nephews on their toes and tell them I'll out them to their parents if they post too much revealing stuff (Just kidding). I think they are getting the message that they shouldn't post anything that their mother couldn't read.

    Hope your thoughts clear. It sucks getting into the revolving door of thoughts in the brain and trying to get out.

  3. THe good thing about Facebook is you can control who you're friends with. You don't have to accept every friend request you get. Or you can adjust the level that they can see your profile. I love it as a tool to keep in touch with people and see what they're up to.

  4. I'm with you - sometimes I love FB and sometimes I hate it!

  5. I agree!!! I did NOT want to conform to FB for awhile...but now I love it. I just love easily keeping up to date w/ everybody that is valuable to me!

    AND Riley just turned 6. So I had my first kid at 19. :D

  6. I think obsessing is really very normal. We all do it... obsessively. x