Sunday, October 10, 2010

Am i kidding myself?

Im eating to much sugar and way to much chocolate... bad habits are rocking the boat and i need this to STOP. This week i need to make a real effort to stop this binge chocolate eating.... its going to slow my weightloss down to nil which is probably already is and me exercising is probably just burning of the chocolate .... this is not good i need to kick things into action and i know that if i cut out half the sugars or all the sugars from my diet at the moment then i will loose weight quick smart with the exercise im doing. REALITY CHECK ASHLEE..... you arent doing yourself any good nor are you reaching the goals you want to in cheating yourself. So there you go.... i put it out there and now its out there i need to follow through.

This weekend.... Hmm has been kinda of average but its ok.... Friday night Mike and i went to a gig (thankgod for mike or i wouldnt have a life at all at the moment) Saturday woke up and pulled out the rest of the main garden bed at the front of my house.... Yep im currently ripping up all the front and re doing the gardens as the lawn has grown into eveeything and i look like i live in a ghetto.... my sister is helping me and its great exercise. So i did that all morning got incredibly feral and hot and tired.... when i stopped i rang my friend JEss and we went for a swim at the pools which was so good and i felt great that i was super active over the weekend. Exercise now is not about it being stressfull and horrible and not wanting to do it... i now do exercise that isnt exercise, its stuff that uses my muscles keeps me active but i actually ENJOY doing :D
Today is Sunday.... i have done nothing... well not nothing, the plants i removed from the front im trying to salvage so i have cleaned them all up and put them in pots so they stay alive until i re plant them.

So now... Here are a few photos which is nothing new... but below is some random fun.

Went to dinner at my sister and brother inlaws house on Wednesday night..... gee wizz this woman knows how to cook.... good old BBQ but its all so wholesome she does everything from scratch and you can taste it in the food.
My outfit for Friday night.... same as the white polka dot but i bought a striped top too and another white one with little blue polka dots... i wear outfits like this all the time because its flattering to my figure, i dont have alot of other things i wear out because they simply dont look as good. My hair turned out good that night and i wore my new big fake round gold earnings ahahah
Another one :D
Phil on the left and Mike on the right.... ahahah i always hang with the boys, specially when its gigs.... Mike is in a band that i help with sometimes and he announced that this SUPER awesome band from the Easter States that i love love love that they will be touring with them but i cant say who or anything because its not officially announced yet....
Mike and i can never have normal photos together.... 1 because he is a knob and has no idea how to smile or be normal in a photo with me. This one is ok lol... we do look like tools.
I liked this photo... but it came out blurry :(
GOOD MORNING! I took this when i woke up ahahahahh i look hell stupid with my lips like that but i like my eyes lol
SEee morning... retarded yawn.
Nothing super exciting about this, i just changed one of my paintings and put my robert plant one up and i thought it looked good.

OK! so onto something very much unrelated but i feel like talking about.... I have this crazy attraction to a particular looking guy at the moment but around where i live they dont exist.... cept of course the two pictures below of the boy i used to hang around with.... wow did he and i have a delusional relationship but holy shit balls was i attracted to him and still am.... he kinda of looks like Bam Margera in real life... a couple of years ago when we were at Soundwave together dudes kept going up to him and being like "hey dude you look like bam" he hated it ahahaha. Ok so getting off track.
I met him randomly at a party, i have no idea how we got close... i think it was because he was best mates with another guy i was super close with called BRyce i will attach photos of him for you ladies for eye candy because his pretty hot. Bryce and i dont talk anymore because he has a drinking problem.... he was fantastic when he was sober and we were closer than anything but when he drank this nasty side came out of him and i couldnt trust him.... i had a huge party for my 25th this year (i should have gotten photos but i was having surgery like 2 weeks later and i dint want to be in photos although i should have taken photos because SO many oh my friends all got together) anyways i ddint invite him he found out and he pretty much hates me now... but i didnt because of his drinking problem and i know its justified.
Anyway onto Anton the friend of his.... Anton had a weird obsession with me and we had the most screwed up friendships.... he wanted me but then didnt want me because i was fat (ewww) we would talk every night on the phone see eachother every few days and nights when we would come home from going out he would beg for me to come inside, which i did but then we would sit on the lounge he would hug and cuddle me and play with my hands all the bullshit cannodling shit but it would never lead anywhere.. it was bullshit. I saw him not long ago and as soon as he saw me he wouldnt leave me and it was crazy and it made me miss him.... but im not allowed to... anyways i have been thinking of him because im attracted to this type of guy and thats what he looks like... sorry about stupid long story. (that wasnt even the full story) point is... his hot... i wanna tap it. LOL


Anton.... omg.... yum... looking at this makes me miss him crazy....
Anton again..... ARGHHHHHHHHHH.

Anton and i together.....

Now... the point is.... here is Mike Patton... incredibly famous... and incredibly HOT YUM LET ME EAT IT.
Another of Mike Patton.
Mike Patton without his shirt on... yum.
John Leguizamos you know him... you know you know him.... YUm
John Leguizamos
Michael Raymond James.... ok lets see who knows what character this guy plays and where his from.... his very edible too.
Michael Raymond James
Michael Raymond James.

Ok soo can you see where im going with the taste of men..... i dont have guys who look like this who live around where i live.... mind you i need to go out more and look more ahahahah... i went out a little this weekend but it wasnt enoughh.... a friend said i need to put myself out there more and they are right.

This was a huge post.... im sorry.....

Although it makes me all nostalgic and i wanna do another huge post of the people i know and the relationships i have had in the past... as well as pics of my ex... and the story of him... not that its that interesting.
I have never had a normal stable relationship in my life so it probably isnt an exciting story about the ex lol.

So there you go.... hmmm sorry for all the reading and if half of the stuff i write is spelt correctly or even written right :D

ps. I just messaged mike to say i missed bryce and anton even tho they are alcoholic retards.... he laughed and said i was crazy... hmmmm his probably right.


  1. Hahaha. Funny post. Those guys are hot. The dude you were talking is Rene from True Blood season 1 and is briefly on season 3. I'm soooo missing True Blood. I have to watch Season 3 again. Its so good.

    Mike Patton is kind of hot, but ever since I read somewhere that he did a shit on stage once, it totally put me off.

    Are you going to see Faith No More when they tour next year?

  2. Loved Rene on True Blood!Even though he was a total psycho. I can't wait for Season 4.

  3. Anton is a hottie for sure!
    I love your eyes, your eyelashes. So beautiful!

  4. Ahhh its RENE from true blood!!!! He is a CRAZY good actor, he plays such a freak!!!! But he is hot hehehe.

    Ummm also THANKYOU for the eye candy. Your friend bryce is HOTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT. Like....incredibly so. Yummmm. You lucky girl.

    I know how you feel about eating shit food and I'm sorry for saying this, but i honesly comforts me that there are people like you that actually DO know how this feels. I can say this to my mum or my therapist like "i can't stop eating junk food its driving me crazy" but they have no idea what that feels like. So as much as I'm bummed for you that you're on a chocolate spree, I completley know what you mean. The last week I've been finding anyway to get calories into me, its very naughty.

    Anyway, as always Ash, loved your post. Good luck with this week without the chocolae :) xoxox

  5. You incredibly beautiful thing.... Lately the chocolate has won for me too... I love it, and moderation doesn;t even enter into it. I know I need to cut it out completely but I will crave it and mourn for it then... too. Will we ever get to a point where we can eat just one and be satisfied? I hope and pray, we will. *Maria*-"This one time at BAND Camp..."