Electoral enrolment....

Gotta love that they have called an election here in Australia in August and of course im not currently enrolled to vote.... yep at 25 i didnt enroll ahahahh im silly.
After work turned into running a mad race to get enrolled to vote because i dont watch the news or really listen to much politics as i dont like the negativity of it all.

Im feeling more comfortable with my band.... its not my best friend yet but we are getting along better then before.

You know whats weird.... normally i would freak out about not having any food in the house for dinner but i dont care... theres always a little something now... because i dont eat like crazy anymore, just having a little of something is ok by me.... im pretty hungry right now its6:30pm as i just got home had a shower and put on Neighbours ahhaha.

I went for a walk this morning.... i dont normally do that but i got up off my bum and went for 40minutes.... i feel like i should do that for my dog more then for myself.... tomorrow ill hopefully do the same :)

Today what i consumed:-
9:00am Large skim milk latte 2 sugars
1:00pm 3 low fat cruskits with 80% light philly cheese and shaved chicken breast with alfalfas ontop.My cruskits i made for lunch (i ate one before i took the photo)
I think at least 1 liter of water so far.
As for dinner... i have no idea... i got something for the dog and then after neighbours i might have either yoghurt or instant mash and ill probably have 2 tbsp of milo in skim milk later (thats my one vice).

Today was horrid at work.... im living in hell at the moment there (sounds bad but i still like my job but it has some rough days) but its ok the girl im great friends with is back tomorrow :D

I took a photo of myself at work... i could have taken a more flattering less doofus looking shot but i thought meh... ill show my AWESOME (sarcasm) rolls ahahah.

Here is a more flattering shot of me sitting in my car at one of my properties....


I love my sunglassses!!!
I took this photo today at one of my properties and edited it a bit.... i think it ended up pretty cool!

Derby baby...

This will only be quick... as im at work and id rather write a bigger blog when i get home.

When i have lost a good chunk of this weight im joining roller derby and im gonna kick some ASS.

Thats another one of my goals :D

On a random note... i need a shoehorn.

Binge terrors! (Picture heavy)

By golly... what the hell happened last night!?!!??!!?!?!?
Just before 9pm i went insane... i had a large low fat chocolate drink and then ate 5 SAO cracks with butter and Vegemite and 5 Low fat cruskits with low fat Philly cheese and i scoffed them..... it was insane.... i just ate ate and ate. I didnt think i would be able to do things like that but i did and i felt horrid for it.

Yesterday i had-

10am Coffee with Spirulina in it

1pm i wholemeal muffin toasted with low fat chunky peanut butter and alfalfa's

2pm 2 plain low fat cruskits

7pm half a handful of mixed boiled cut up veggies and half a palm size of garlic lemon pepper fish and lemon juice

then the 9pm HELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL ARGHHHHHH

Today so far-

10am coffee with spirulina and thats IT, have had nothing else so far and its 12:30pm just after lunch and im going to try and hold off before i start grazing.
Edit*
1:30pm 1 cup of pea and ham soup and 1 half of a toasted wholemeal muffin with a small amount of butter.
5:00pm 2 tablespoons milo and cold skim milk
7:30pm 1 cup instant mash with low fat cheese and low fat sour cream with 2 scrambled eggs which was made with a little skim milk and small amount of butter in the pan

I felt so bad about last night :(

DONT WORRY KIDDIES i still havent lost anything for now officially 7 days :( this is getting annoying..... i do tend to forget i lost alot of weight in just over a month so i cant kick myself.

Here is a photo of me and my friend Liz.... she is like a walking piece of art and her hair is so crazy..... she hangs with my goth bunch of friends but she is sooo awesome, she lost a little bit of weight just recently too which im super proud of her.
I understand some of you once you have seen this photo will go WOAHHHH that girl looks all kind of crazy but if you met her you would see she is the most sweet and kind hearted person out there. I love people who are unique and willing to be OUT there and she rocks it. This is my favourite of the many hair colourings she has done.... this yellow is literally FLURO in person... its crazy.
My friend LIz on the left and me on the right taken on Friday me at 25 ahahah (25 Arghhh)
My beautiful and unique friend Liz

So i thought i would attempt to find some old photos of myself as a blonde teenager and i succeeded.... this was when i went to the gym everyday and calorie counted everything and i was a skinny minny with a 6 pack stomach...... me blonde was weird but im kinda tempted to go back when i have lost the weight.


Me and my best friend NAt (he was beau of the ball) at age 17
This is at the after ball more of a body shot at age 17
Full length shot at the ball age 17
Me and my friend Gia at my 21st im on the left at age 21 obviously lol
Me and some friends at my 21st, i look fat... and well i was fat then ahhaahha
I would be about 21 in this photo i think
This is a photo i edited from my work ball in 09 age 24... this photo is cool then the one below is nasty
Kind of full length shot of me before the work ball in 09 age 24 i look stupid!
I would probably be 21 in this shot

I had a nervous breakdown when i was 20 and moved back with my parents for a little while this shot was when my parents got our puppy JAk..... that puppy got me through my rough patch.


So thats a little bit of me over the years..... from a pic taken 2 nights ago to photos dating back 7 years ago.... its crazy how much i think ive changed and how much i still think i look the same.... ive had the weight issue for years but i look back when i was skinnier and i thought i was fat and i think now my god you were silly, thats what being a teenager will do.

:D
Ash

I LOVE PEAS!

Peas are my favourite ever.....

I am now trying to have them for a snack throughout the day....

PEAS FOR THE WIN!

Highway to the dangerzone!

All i keep singing is that song in my head......

I read about some people sometimes falling into a bad way with food and thats what happened to me last night.... here it is outlined simply.

Chips and dip, chips and dip, chips and dip, chips and dip and 1 quiche and 7 m&m's and half of one weird small dessert thing at the 50th.

Silly me i went out last night hungry. Yesterday at work i had 1 large skinny cappuccino and 2 plain low fat cruskits. Then i came home from work and went for a walk to the park with the dog with a friend, came back had a coffee and that was it before i got ready and went out at 6pm.
Now i usually get my most hungry at night... i can go all day without eating pretty much but as soon as i come home all i want to do is eat :( (i think i need another fill) so by going out last night and not having anything decent to eat i snacked on horrid bad things and i felt so guilty but wow did i enjoy it..... im dangerous..... so easily it seems i could fall back into bad habbits, but its ok.... im aware of these bad habbits so im trying to shape myself into a better and healthier way of thinking.

Feeling a bit blerg... really need to look for some good recipes. Cara has given me some tips and ill have to try and give them a go...

Oh well.... hopefully ill go back to normal now and not have a slip up like that again... in all honesty i dont think it was as bad as i think it was but i still know it wasnt good and didnt help me at all.


BYOC............ im joining the fun of BYOC Woooooooooooooooooooo!

1. Because I’m going hardcore on Monday to lose my last 15 before vacation I’m curious….what’s the oddest diet you have tried? Or which ones have you tried and were any successful?
Arghhhh dieting fun..... i think the atkins was the oddest for me where all you would eat was fatty meats and thats it..... it didnt last long and it was horrible. I have had affective diets and i have had ones that fail. Im not going to sit here and tell you about one that was successful because in all honesty none of them were that effective, if they had been any good i wouldnt have probably had this surgery. I HATE DIETS.

2. Do you prefer baths or showers?
I love both! Depending on my moods..... i love a nice shower when its in a nice big shower with a huge shower head.... i love coming home and jumping in the shower and chilling myself out before the nights events.
Where as i love baths to chill..... i love running a bath with bubbles and sitting in it, reading, burning candles and incense and allowing me to have some special time for myself. I love baths but in most cases im to tall for them..... half of my hangs out because im tall and that SUCKS! Theres always something grrrrrrrr.
If i build my next house i will make sure i fit out a nice big bath that will fit my height.

3. What is your favorite breakfast food?
OMG breakfast is my favourite time of the day..... but since this surgery i havent felt comfortable eating anything, the only thing i can really stomach is a shake. I used to love special breakfasts my mum would put on which was cooked sausages, cooked egg on the bbq, jam and cream croissants, toast and bacon bacon and bacon. Oh my golly that is the best...... i would eat it all up and want more. I loved going out for breakfast and having someone cook me a nice big breaky.... i think thats something ill miss :( I need to find a new favourite meal.

4. What’s your least favorite word? I hate to sound like everyone else but i hate the C word like everyone else.... I have never said it, its horrible and tacky and when it comes out of a woman's mouth i look at them and start questioning their character. Yes i will judge you by the words that come out of your mouth!

5. Repeat question…make someone a Superstar for a day! Whose blog or comment spoke to you or stuck with you the most this week and why?
I want to make 2 SUPERSTARS for the week for me as this has been my first week on here and 2 women have been incredibly helpful and allow me to keep faith with the decision that i have recently just made. My shout outs go to: The Dash- CAra HEr comments and posts this week have been incredibly helpful and looking at how successful and strong she has become since the surgery give me faith you can do this healthily and happily. Its very fortunate that shes a PErth girl too...hopefully we will get to meet and she can tell me about all her fun adventures over the past year being banded! Banded and blogging- Janice.... although on the otherside of the world her comments have shown concern and faith. She is so incredibly helpful and its nice knowing someone can see so much potential in me, she is working hard on trying to help me work out all this madness. Whats nice is she was recently banded too... so we are super band buddies together! Although i shout out to these 2 incredible ladies, all this week i have had comments from people are following on me here that are also so fantastic..... all you comments and help this week have made me realise im doing the right thing. I feel like i can now do this with all of your help and thats making me get a grip a little better. THANK YOU!

PS.

Whats BYOC?!

Doing 'a runner...

What a lovely way to start a Friday morning... come in to find a tenant has done a runner.... thats always fun.

This week has NOT been my week.... everyday i wake up and feel a little meh. One of my close friends from work has been on holidays and i know this factors into it as she props me up alot at work and without her here im feeling pretty blah.

When i was on the 6 small meals from the dietitian i felt energetic and i was incredibly positive about the whole thing but now that im not eating anywhere near as much my energy levels suck big time and its making me pretty depressed in the mornings.

Being on solids now and in fear of eating anything solid is making things quite frustrating... im lazy when it comes to cooking (i have been better recently) but im all about things being easy especially when i have no energy. Everyone talks about high protein diets, im barely eating any meats at the moment... actually id say none, you can call me VEGO lol. So what do you guys have for a high protein dinner? should i be cooking more mince maybe although the doc didnt recommend it, i need to cook more fish but buying fresh fish is annoying (can you buy packet fish?). I wish there was agood lap band recipes book, or maybe there is and i was unaware?

I live off coffee now to keep me alive.

I have 2 parties to go to tonight so coffee better work or i will sleep at both of them. Ill attempt at eat maybe some of the party food just to see if it goes down but dont worry i wont be that adventurous and ill probably decide on the healthier options if there are any.

I went to an appointment yesterday and the woman i had a meeting with had lap band surgery for 5 years.... when i left the appointment i felt more depressed then i ever had. She laughed that she thinks she s a bulimic and admits so easily she cheats with the band all the time. She doesnt liek fruit or veg and eats bad food all the time, she was telling em how i could eat certain take aways and what not. GOD DAMNNN i dont wanna know about that. It was horrid. It made me want to be healthier then ever meeting her. Her eyes looked sullen and her skin looked bad... i want to glow and look healthy not skinny and drawn out.

Seeing all the women who have lost so much weight in the year makes me so proud of them.... i love seeing photos of the change and it makes me so incredibly happy for them... and i also get excited that i hope thatll be me just before im 26!

I should be working but i am hating on today and this week..... i need to go buy a 50th birthday present... im thinking a lovely book would be nice!

I loved Spirulina... it felt like it gave me energy

Also.... i have nutriChew orange chewable multivitamins... they taste horrid.... any other ideas for me here in AUS? I used to have Spirulina in my optifast everymorning and i felt that was doing me the world of good but now im not having it because i dont have breakfast anymore.

Nutrichew- i hate these chews they taste nasty and i dont feel like they are giving me any energy.

So things are ok but not great...i hope next week is a better week.

I have lost no weight in 5 days, i keep fluctuating between 1-2 kilos on the scales but it still is TTOTM and because of my Implanon TTOTM is usually pretty erratic and horrible .... :(